Firefighters, Ice Cream, & Cute Butts

Recently my producer came to me and said, “Crusoe, we need to see more butts”.

At first I thought he was playing a prank on me, but then he continued, “seriously, the numbers don’t lie. Fans go crazy for your butt. Oakley’s too. So in your next post we need to see more of those hunky haunches”.

“With pleasure!” I told him.

So fans, hope you’re happy – this post features lots of cute butts. Couple that with the fact that Oakley and I are back as the Dachshund Fire Brigade, and we’ve got a surefire winner with the ladies!

Cute Dog Fire Truck Costume

But let’s start at the beginning.

It was only by a last-minute decision that my brother Oakley decided to head up to my chalet for another quick weekend with me. Perhaps he wanted his redemption for his earlier fire drill mishap where he crashes into the cupboard.

So anyway, we decided to try again – the scenario this time being a barbecue fire drill.

Here was our first run through…

As you can see, Oakley didn’t quite make the turn out of the bedroom, but did employ a nice and quick 3-point-turn recovery. Then at the sliding door we had a little miss-communication as to “who should go first”.

We discussed this during the review meeting afterwards, wherein I told him that the firefighter (myself) should always be first to arrive on scene, followed by the firetruck.

So with that understanding, we tried again…

A bit closer! But not quite!

You have to admire Oakley’s turn around the bed though – with a nice little drift into the wall – just enough to bounce him back onto track. From there he makes it all the way to the sliding door, but just miscalculates the width of his truck to the opening.

Oh well, at least we’re getting better, step by step! And at least we could decide who goes out the door first!

[As my fan Pam Gray said on Facebook, “Oakley’s insurance rates must be through the roof with kind of driving…”]

It was then that I told Oakley we should pose for a quick glamour shot for my next calendar! Because who doesn’t love sexy wiener dog firefighters in their calendar?

Dachshund Fire Fighters

I’m sure this photo alone will make it sell off the shelf!

After all that excitement, we needed to wind down and relax a bit, so I suggested to Oakley we take a nice boat ride into town where we can stop at the beach and then go get some ice cream.

He was of course ‘on board’ with that!

But before we boarded, I had to hear it once – you know what I’m talking about…

Coolest Dog in the World

“Permission to come aboard, oh great and handsome Fleet Admiral?”

Why yes, please do! ; )

I’ve been so happy about my latest promotion to Fleet Admiral that I even waited on the pier 30 minutes early before our departure time just to show off my new shoulder boards!

Fleet Admiral Dachshund

That’s a stunning figure of a dachshund if I ever saw one!

But once we cast off, I (reluctantly) passed the wheel temporarily over to Dad so Oakley and I could get a bit more comfortable.

From Navy uniform to board shorts…

Cute Dachshund Breed

…That’s why they call me a dog of many talents.

So with our ears in the wind and noses to the sea, we were constantly on the lookout for the beach and any babes that may be floundering and in need of rescuing.

Cute Dog Bums

We didn’t find any of the latter, but we did eventually find the beach.

Beach Bums

You would think that chicks would be flocking around us like a bunch of seagulls around someone’s lunch, but we only seemed to draw attention from onlookers, who appeared to find something funny about our appearance…

Wiener Dogs in Swim Suits

“Oakley, are you not flexing?!” I asked, suddenly considering this as the issue.

“Always bro, just like you taught me!” Oakley quickly responded in his macho voice – although he didn’t look it. However, I do have to commend him, as he has been shaping up a bit since our last encounter now that he’s on a diet.

“There’s no chicks here”, he said. “Let’s go get some ice cream!”

“What about your diet?!”

“Who needs a diet when there’s no ladies around?”

“Fine”, I said. “But you have to come with me on a good walk expedition afterwards”. So that sealed the deal, and we were off to get some ice cream.

– But not as Crusoe and Oakley. No, we were getting ice cream as BATDOG & Robin (just in case any chicks came by and saw us stuffing our face with ice cream, at least we’d be superheros).

Dogs Eating Ice Cream

Synchronized lickers – a true team!

And eyes shut out of pure delicious, creamy pleasure!

But as I should have suspected, Oakley soon finished his and was looking to get into my cone!

Cute Dogs Eating Ice Cream

Getting into my ice cream – now that’s where I’ll have to draw the line as a ‘team’.

After that little treat it was back home, but not before I happened to notice something amazing during the boat ride on the way back…

“What kind of superhero is this?! That can fly above the water with a jet stream from his feet?! …I must have…


Water Jet Ski Doo

Dad is going to make me this. I don’t care what safety concerns you may have.. An amphibious airborne wiener is the next level of awesomeness I must attain.

Once we were back at the house, both Oakley and I were waiting by the door, ready for our expedition.

Dachshunds Waiting by the Door

It was an adventure as always.

And although Mum and Dad had trouble in some of the overgrown paths, us dachshunds enjoy the convenience of walking right under the undergrowth!


It’s always a blast when my brother Oakley comes to visit, and I’m so glad he surprised me with an extra weekend.

But you haven’t seen the last of him. Heck, we still have lots of practice to do as firefighter and fire truck…!

In the meantime, we’ll be both doin’ our thing…

Cute Dachshund Bums

That is, Oakley lookin’ for chipunks – me for babes.

Keep drillin’,

~ Crusoe

Don’t forget to “like” and “share” this post!



12 Responses to Firefighters, Ice Cream, & Cute Butts

  1. Crusoe, you and Oakley are cracking me up with your fire drills! I watch them over and over and they never get old…..keep ’em coming. By the way, you two look pretty dashing in your board shorts! Love it when you get together. Can’t wait until your next adventure…..makes me smile and laugh every time! Thanks.

  2. Crusoe, you and Oakley make a great team, and he sure is looking good since he lost a couple of pounds and toned up a bit, he looks more like you now. I do feel sorry for him in his fire truck, because he keeps bumping into things, as a matter of fact, I am surprised that he even participated again in the drill after his first video!!! I so enjoyed watching and reading your blog!!!!

  3. Crusoe – LOVE that you’re intelligent enough to use the ramp when flying off that bed! (Just like a fireman would use a pole you use your ramp) Perhaps someday you and Oakley will go into the ice cream business – instead of Baskin & Robbins you can be Batman & Robins! Stay safe and enjoy your summer xox to all!

  4. Crusoe – LOVE that you’re intelligent enough to use the ramp when flying off that bed! (Just like a fireman would use a pole you use your ramp) Perhaps someday you and Oakley will go into the ice cream business – instead of Baskin & Robbins you can be Batdog & Robins! Stay safe and enjoy your summer xox to all!

  5. As ever, an absolutely brilliant blog. You and Oakley are true stars. Love the fire drill, (poor Oakley) -you made my day! Definitely need to see and admire those doxie butts. Are you seriously going to try to be an “airborne wiener”? I admire you courage but would rather have you safe and on terra firma. Keep blogging. XXXX

  6. Greetings from the uk my little miniature dachshund pup Ralphy and I are big fans! Give our love to Crusoe xxxx

  7. My grandsons left for camp yesterday for a month. They both made me promise to keep them posted on Crusoe’s adventures. I said I would send pictures and stories. My daughter wrote about her Doxie Louie. The book is the adventures of Lonestar Louie. They look so much alike. I’d love to send Crusoe the book if he would like it.

  8. Oh gosh, they’re gorgeous! I discovered this blog just recently and I really love it! I have a dachshund myself, a long-haired, 13 years old and really cuddly one:)

  9. Crusoe
    You and Oakley are cracking Gabby and I up!!!
    Loving the fire drills!
    Pound to the paw lil buddy!
    We love u!

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Crusoe the Celebrity Dachshund

Crusoe is the wiener dog extraordinaire who has won the hearts of many through his wacky home-made outfits, viral videos, NYTimes Bestselling book, and larger-than-life personality.


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