My Trip to The Book Store

I recently went to visit my local book store, Chapters, with Mum and Dad. She likes going there to enjoy a Starbucks coffee as she browses the teen romance section (she’s a little sensitive about me telling people that, but too late).

However, she has read 50 Shades of Grey, so I guess that doesn’t count as ‘teen’ romance.

Actually that gives me an idea. I think the fans would like a book on the 50 Shades of Crusoe. I definitely have enough material to work with .. ; )

Anyway, back to the subject. Most people don’t seem to know that you can bring your dog inside Chapters – so now you know. I had several people come up to me and ask why I was allowed inside, so that’s evidence enough. Not sure how much Chapters wants to advertise that fact, but either way, I’m doing it for them now!

As my first trip to a book store, I was overwhelmed with the wealth of literature around me. I asked the first employee I saw where the ‘sexy lady and wieners’ section is, which she rudely responded by saying “this isn’t the store for that”.

Don’t know what the heck that was about, but anyway, I decided I’d find it myself.

My first stop was the closest section I could find to ‘Celebrity Wiener Dogs’, which was Adventure and Literary Travel. I imagine that if I ever have a book, it will need to be here.

Crusoe Celebrity Dachshund in the Adventure Section

Since I don’t have my book yet, the only way I could picture how my book would look in this section was by hopping up and displaying myself right there. I think it looks pretty good here, but then again it’s hard to judge because I always look good.

(Did you find my website watermark in the above?)

But then I saw all the other sections, and started to question myself. My book will definitely have some romance in there, too. So it should be in the below section as well. Most people look at me as their womanizing hero (which I am), but I can also be very romantic.

Crusoe Dachshund is a Romantic

In fact, I may just be going on my first-ever in-person date pretty soon, so stay tuned for that.

Then I came to the Sexuality section where I found this revolutionary new book called the Kama Sutra, and oh boy, that’s not for children – even though all the illustrations are cartoons.

Dachshund Book Store

That gave me another idea by the way, which is why don’t dogs have their own version of this book? If anyone were to write one it’d definitely be me.

And the first position in the book: ‘human style’. I haven’t decided what exactly that means yet though..

Yet, after looking through just about all the sections in the store, I couldn’t find just one which would really capture the essence of “Crusoe the Celebrity Dachshund”. So when I get my book I’ll just have to request it be placed on every shelf..

Cute Wiener Dog - Crusoe!

As I stood up on a little stool looking ever-so studious and distinguished with my thinking glasses on, I couldn’t help but notice this other guy in tight jeans and a wavy blue scarf start talking to Dad as he snapped pictures of me. I then realized that because Mum was browsing another section, this guy must have been gay and was starting to chat up Dad. I couldn’t help but find that situation a little funny. Not sure he’ll like me telling this story either…

But hey, that’s what you get for taking pictures of your wiener in public.

After Mum came to rescue Dad from his little predicament, we headed over to the Adventure Fiction section. This is where Dad showed me a very special book.

He sat me at a quiet reading table and placed a book in front of me called Robinson Crusoe. He explained this was who I was named after.

Crusoe Reading Robinson Crusoe

I spent the next hour or so reading through it, and I can so see why I was named after this guy. We both shared a deep sense of adventure and a natural ability to instill fascination in the public eye. Plus we both like Fridays (you’ll have to know a bit about Robinson Crusoe to get that one).

Crusoe Dachshund with Glasses Doing Some Reading

I thought that was quite a magical moment of self-awakening for me – to truly understand the story behind the name ‘Crusoe’. I’m sure Mr. Robinson would have liked me if I was on that island with him.

So all in all, I really liked Chapters (except that first employee I spoke to) and will probably return. Actually, I bet I will see a lot more dogs there next time now that I’ve got the word out.

Not sure if Dad will come next time though. But hey, I told him to consider it a compliment.

If there were ever a Crusoe book, what section do you think it would belong in?

Keep readin’,

~ Crusoe



13 Responses to My Trip to The Book Store

  1. The Biography Section I can just see it now…”My Life as a Celebrity Weiner” by CRUSOE

  2. Aww Crusoe, every story and every tale, you make me giggle. Your stories are just like mine. I was at a farm on Saturday to see my brothers from another mother, Monty and Bobo the Pygmy Goats. They werent that fussed I came to see them as the sun was out and they were concentrating on their tans incase any ladies (other than me) visited them later.
    High paw to you and happy Monday. Luv Margaret

  3. Dear Crusoe, My 2 doxies (Lily and Hartley) love checking into your posts daily to see what adventures you are on! We are so glad we found you on facebook! Plus, you are a very handsome guy (our Ms. Lily wanted me to tell you that!) Keep those stories coming…..

  4. “The magical moment of self-awakening,” is a fantastic way to express yourself….ah, literature. “And thus I have given the first Part of a Life of Fortune and Adventure,” (Daniel Defoe, Robinson Crusoe). This was totally written about YOU! Looking at your life, your “pawtobiography” could only be in the adventures section; possibly with Treasure Island & Huck Finn.
    **We love the book titled ‘Northern Heat’ from your pic. Was that your first book?
    Shakespearian, semitropical, skilled, substantive, and still looking <3 Bonnie Lee <3

    • Aha, I see the history teacher knows her English literature! I do tend to agree that my heart belongs in the adventure section. Never read Northern Heat, but now I might! Thanks for the tip! You should have mentioned ‘scholarly’ in there this time ; )

      Stay sexy, Bonnie Lee.

  5. I think it would be in the adventurous heroic humorous section (if there was such thing)You would totally be in it! It would be called

    The Adventures of Crusoe the Celebrity Dachshund

    or does that sound a bit long?

    P.S You look just like me!

    P.S.S My name is Snoopy


    P.S.S.S.S You inspired me to write a blog of myself! Snoopy the Dachshund (that isn’t the name of it though)
    P.S.S.S.S.S I am freaking out right now!
    P.S.S.S.S.S.S I am a male too
    P.S.S.S.S.S.S.S.S 🙂

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Crusoe the Celebrity Dachshund

Crusoe is the wiener dog extraordinaire who has won the hearts of many through his wacky home-made outfits, viral videos, NYTimes Bestselling book, and larger-than-life personality.


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