A Dachshund Spa Treatment

As you know, Mum is planning on going to the Cayman Islands in March – without me. She knows how badly I want to come, but she insists that this time I can’t. Now this has been a major source of tension between us lately. Dad isn’t going either because he has to work, so at least I’ll have some good bonding time with him. But Mum will pay for this..

I’ve been trying desperately to prove to her that I am able to go. I’ve shown her how good a swimmer I am, how well I know how snorkel, and how I even know how to drive a boat! (Good thing Oakley isn’t going..). In fact, Oakley is such a goofball I just had to make this picture of him last week:

dachshund driving

Another reason I should go to Caymans: I am excellent at sun tanning.

wiener dog relaxing

So Mum has been trying to ‘bribe’ me into not having any hard feelings. I will happily accept those bribes, but that it no way means my feelings will be any less hard. She even offered to give me a home spa treatment. Heck yes!

So Mum hired a professional private dog masseuse to come by to give me a fantastic massage. It was amazing. Whenever I get a really good massage I start to yawn and make my little yawn-noise..

Just check it out and see.


After the massage, it was time for a nice facial treatment. She put a steamed towel over my back then whipped up some yogurt and plastered it on my face with some cucumbers. I didn’t really get this one. First of all, yogurt is too delicious to be used as facial cream, so I kept trying to lick it up. And the cucumbers.. don’t know what the heck those do – they don’t even taste good. To be honest, I think she did this one more to be able to laugh at me than to actually help my skin complexion. If yes, she’s playing a dangerous game for someone who’s currently in my bad book.

wiener dog spa facial

This endeavor turned out to be a bit of a mess. I had enough of it after 2 minutes. I guess I’m too manly to get facial spa treatments.. She had also planned to give me a manicure pedicure, or whatever you would call it for dogs after the facial, but I told her forget it. A massage is enough for me.

So that was my first home spa treatment. Besides the massage, I’m not that impressed. I’ll have to try a real spa one day to see if it’s any better. It’s (very) possible that Mum just doesn’t know what she’s doing either..

But I’ve always wondered, does anyone else’s doggy do that little noise I do when I yawn? I’m curious..

Keep winnin’,

~ Crusoe



13 Responses to A Dachshund Spa Treatment

  1. Sasha makes funny little noises too! They crack me up when they get so relaxed they start yawning and fall asleep. Although once I stop rubbing Sasha she wakes up and glares at me!

  2. Ok, so I just found your blog and LOVE it! It makes me miss my dachshund so much. I have seriously considered smuggling him into my college dorm room (poo on other people’s allergies). 🙂

  3. I haven’t noticed if my boys make little yawn noises. I’ll have to listen next time. Kool does a little whiny noise when he wants up on the bed, though. It’s pretty darn cute. Glad you enjoyed your massage!

  4. Dear Crusoe – Ask your masseuse to look for your Banjo Spot (mine’s just below my right ear). It makes my back leg kick in ecstasy! Only my mom can find it.

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Crusoe the Celebrity Dachshund

Crusoe is the wiener dog extraordinaire who has won the hearts of many through his wacky home-made outfits, viral videos, NYTimes Bestselling book, and larger-than-life personality.



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