"The wiener dog who thinks he's more of a celebrity than he really is (for now)"

The Truth About Wire Haired Dachshunds

It wasn’t exactly by my own will that this post came to be. Many people have been encouraging me to put my issue with wire haired dachshunds to rest. I was reluctant at first, as I am quite stubborn in my ways (which is expected as a dachshund), but I figured I would at least give them another chance to regain my trust.

Let’s back up a bit first though. It all started almost 2 years ago at a wiener dog race in Montreal. It was a very important race, in fact it was the qualifying round for the finals. We were all lined up on the starting block, waiting for the starter gun to fire when seconds before, a wire haired took off early.

As a fair sport, I still waited for the gun to go, but once it did I bolted out of there at lightening speed, whipping past the wire haired before crossing the finish line in first place. Read more about it and watch the video here.

Since then, I’ve had a hard time trusting them.

Anyway, I’ve decided to see for myself if I can trust wired hairs by inviting one particular wiry fellow over to my home for the day to conduct a series of tests, interviews, and covert monitoring. I also decided that for the first part of his visit at least, I would maintain my own disguise as I wire haired.

Dog in Disuise

If he thought I was one of his kind, he might open up and expose something of interest.

So to introduce my ‘guest’ (I guess we can call him that), below is Cooper (formerly Jack) – a mini dachshund who was just recently rescued from a shelter in the nick of time before being euthanized.

Cooper the Wired Hair Dachshund

Cooper is currently with a foster family and is up for adoption. More details at the end of this post.

Before he arrived, I had Mum hide all our valuables around the house, especially the trophy I ended up winning at that race.

Dad picked him up from the foster parents in the morning. Cooper arrived and introduced himself rather politely. I did likewise, albeit skeptically. I’ve never really gotten this up close and personal with a wire haired before, but my disguise gave me confidence.

Two Wired Hair Dachshunds

I’m pretty sure he fell for it.

Cooper then sniffed around the house while I observed from my master chair. He soon found my pile of toys and did not hesitate to start trying them out.

I would have appreciated him asking first, but I understand he might not have all the same high-society mannerisms that I’ve become accustomed to.

Cute Wired Hair Doxie

He was choosing a lot of the boring ones though (except the rubber chicken – that’s a pretty good one), so at this point I felt the need to hop down and show him which toys were good.

Dachshund Playing Together

However, For some reason he took an interest in just about all the ones I wasn’t that fond of, which I didn’t really mind.

And so we formed our acquaintance over a couple squeakies.

Smooth Hair vs Wired Hair Dachshund

All that squeaking got me in a playful mood, so I went to my big teddy (named Big T), and started to shake it around.

I guess Cooper found this a good opportunity to relieve some of his sexual tension from being in the joint all that time.

I wasn’t impressed.

After Cooper settled in a bit (and released some of that energy), I thought it a good time to conduct my interview.

We sat opposite each other while I asked questions from my clipboard. He seemed a little distracted at first by the camera, but I assured him he was only being recorded for quality purposes.

*wink*

Dachshund Rescue Interview

Here’s a little on how the interview went:

Crusoe: “we’ll start with a basic question. What is your name?”

Cooper: “Jack. Oh wait no, it’s Cooper now.”

Hm, not the best start. Is he bullshitting or does he actually not know?

Crusoe: “where are you from?”

Cooper: “I was at shelter in Quebec, but was just rescued and am now with a foster family.”

Crusoe: “and how did you end up in this shelter?”

Cooper: “my old owners couldn’t care for me anymore.”

I wondered why, and made a quick note to revisit this point.

Crusoe: “Mhm. And have you ever committed a crime?”

Cooper: “I stole a bit of food once because I was hungry.”

I discretely gestured at Dad to go hide my kibbles.

Crusoe: “why did you hump my teddy?”

Cooper: “well, I just got neutered a few days ago, so I’ve been meaning to see if everything still works down there.”

Crusoe: “I can relate to that – unfortunately. However, next time please do so on your own teddy. Big T needs to be washed now and I much prefer him tasting like dirt and my own dried up saliva.”

I continued..

Crusoe: “have you ever broke someone’s trust, cheated, or disobeyed rules?”

Cooper: “I did what I had to do while in the joint, but it was my last owners that betrayed MY trust.. I’ve been without a real home for a while now.”

Wire Hair Rescue Dachshund

A strange feeling overcame me. Could it be compassion?

Crusoe: “and how do you feel about being a wire haired?”

Cooper: “good I guess, but I find myself questioning why a nice family doesn’t come and adopt me. I am well behaved, house trained, just-neutered (as we discussed) and would be so grateful to have someone to love me and call their own.”

Ok, this interview was starting to get a bit too sappy for me. I needed to lighten the spirits and change it up.

I decided we would play a couple games. Having setup a series of hidden cameras, my objective was to see if Cooper might be tempted to try a slight of hand, especially when I offered him one of my toys to keep if he won.

Black Brindle Wire Hair Dachshund

We started with a light game of cards. Poker in fact. He had never played before so I had to educate him on the rules. At one point he said he had a ‘quadruple flush of a kind’, to which I said “what the heck is that?”

He claimed it a terminology error in having only just learned the rules, and I (reluctantly) let it slide.

After a few hands I had pulled away in the lead, and was getting slightly cocky enough to stick out my tongue when he wasn’t looking.

Dogs Playing Poker

However, I called it quits before getting too carried away.

Next up was Scrabble.

It was a pretty close game at first, but after a while I couldn’t help but display my “I know I’m going to win look” – part 2.

Crusoe Dachshund Playing Scrabble

All in all, judging from my experience playing with him and after later reviewing the surveillance tapes, I’d say he kept it pretty clean. I’d be lying if I said I wasn’t just a little disappointed in not catching him red handed with a couple cards up his sleeve, but oh well.

And before I knew it, it was time for Cooper to go home. We said our goodbyes, and I sent him on his way with a few of my toys that he really seemed to like.

Dachshund with Toy

Ill admit, I rather enjoyed my day and might even call Cooper a friend. In an effort to speak frank, Cooper was a very sweet and gentle little guy with quite a comical character.  Despite his history, he was always friendly and jovial. He followed Dad around a lot too, which tells me he really wishes for his furever home. It makes me appreciate how ever-so fortunate I’ve been in my life – to have a loving family and a real home (plus a couple vacation homes), not to mention I’m a world famous celebrity who gets tons of chicks. I really hope Cooper finds a similar good fortune soon.

So what is the verdict you ask? Well, I would say my previous, undiscriminating distrust in wired hairs has perhaps been a little unwarranted considering the results of today’s analysis. I would be able to say I wholly trust them now if it wasn’t for one little thing that I discovered after Cooper left. Dad brought up my dog bed from the car when he returned, and upon sniffing it I immediately realized that he had pooped on my bed!

Not sure why he did that but anyway, I’ve learned not to dwell on these things. He’s just lucky he only did that on my car bed and not in my luxurious sleeping quarters.

And so I think we can officially say “I trust them”, albeit with just a little healthy skepticism.

In conclusion, I had a good time with Cooper, and I’m thinking I might just keep on my disguise for the fun of it.

wired-hair-disguise

Keep trustin’,

~ Crusoe


Update:  I am happy to inform you that Cooper has now found his furever home with a loving new family.

If you would like to help out other foster dachshunds with stories like Cooper, please visit my local Canadian Dachshund Rescue (CDR) website for available dogs for adoption or to make a donation. You can also help by voting for me as Best Active Living Blog at the Petties, where if I win, $1000 will donated to CDR.

Comments

comments

32 Responses to The Truth About Wire Haired Dachshunds

  1. We’re glad Crusoe is gonna give the wired-hairs a chance! Our wheaten colored wire haired “Woodrow” is excited he might be appreciated on the blog in the future!

  2. Crusoe, I love your blog and can’t wait to read about your next adventure, perhaps with Oakley? By the way, your “I know I’m going to win” look is the best!

    P.S. Glad to hear that Cooper found a furever home!

    P.S.S. That disguise of yours sure fooled me! :)

  3. AWWWWW…..I have tears in my eyes! Cooper was rescued, found a friend, & found his ‘furever’ home! OMG…I have no words. He is kind and gentle (except for the relief of tension…ohhhh)& didn’t cheat at cards.
    I am all choked up…sniff….how wonderful of you to share your toys and family with him.
    **Next time you are in disguise as a wire hair, use cotton candy. That would also attract females to another SLWP!
    Sniff, sniff, snivel, sniff, & single, <3Bonnie Lee<3

    • Great idea on the cotton candy! Plus it might taste good. I’m happy for Cooper too. Out of a sad story came a happy one. Need a tissue Bonnie? You can borrow my shoulder.. ; )

  4. Crusoe, I fall more in love with you with every blog. You were so kind to invite over a wirehair and take an op to actually get to know him. I’m glad he won you over because Cooper was a real cutie. Part of me was hoping, after you said he was looking for a furever home, that he might become your brother!! But so nice to hear that he’s found a family, and hope they will love him as much as your mum and dad love you. Hope you get another play date with Coop real soon!!! He’s a little hottie!! P.S. Love the disguise. You couldn’t be any more dashing if you tried!! Love you!

    • Haha, thanks Chris! Mum definitely had an eye on him.. but he’s in a happy home now, and I hope to see him soon! Keep ballin!

  5. Oh Crusoe, I too was hoping Cooper might become your brother! I too was saved from a shelter. When my mom brought me home I was so afraid of everyone. I’m getting better and I feel safe now in my own “furever” home. I’m happy for Cooper! Hugs…your wire haired friend, Beckham.

  6. Oh, Crusoe – your “I’m going to win!” look is priceless – still have tears in my eyes from laughing so hard! We love you!

  7. What a lovely piece of writing. My mum read it to me, but she had to take her time as reading about Cooper’s past life made her (and me) sad. So happy he’s found a new and loving home as I was on a mission to see if my cousin in Houston could help out. You’ve convinced me about the wired haired guys too. Good work!
    High paw C!
    Luv Margaret
    PS your disguise is kinda hot :)

    • Why thank you Margaret from Scotland. I’m happy too that Cooper found a home. Didn’t really expect my disguise to be ‘hot’, but on the other hand, I guess it’s not that surprising ; )

  8. Again you have made me laugh & smile Crusoe. So glad to read about your day with Cooper and happy that he found his furever home. Glad you were able to overlook his “errors” while visiting, I’m sure he is in a period of adjustment after all that has happened to him.
    Your game winning looks are the best!!!!!

  9. Lady was so impressed by this post that she began an impromptu pre-dinner romp with our Cooper. She wanted me to read it to him but was eager to get the dinner activities underway.
    All good stuff from your world. Thanks for bringing smiles and sharing the true personality of dachshunds with those of us who love them and whose lives would be forever diminished without their presence. Love to all,
    Cindy (writing on behalf of Lady and Cooper) They have not learned to type yet.

  10. As the owner of two Wirehair Dachshunds I can tell you Crusoe that your disguise was perfect – you totally had me fooled! So happy to hear little Cooper found a forever home too!

  11. Hey Crusoe…. How do you feel about us mutts? My annoying brother Monti is a chiweenie, gawd he’s so annoying he’s always chasing his tail what a dufus… And me I’m a very regal looking doxie mix, I think my dad was a Manchester terrier but who knows cause he took off before I was ever born… Pffft his loss… I’ve never trusted wire hairs either, why do they pretend to look like grandpas and grandmas? They are definitely up to something….

    • I can’t say I’ve really formed an opinion on them yet.. but I do agree, there’s just something suspicious looking about wire hairs. But oh well, I’ll do my best to trust them.

  12. I’m so emotional seeing cooper as I have lost my dog who’s the same breed as cooper. It’s like looking at my baby captain. I just came upon this website and still can’t believe my eyes. I pray and hope his new family takes care of him and loves and adore him. He so precious just like my captain. I love you my boy.

  13. He’s great do like my big boy and the same unusual colouring. Will look forward to your smile making blogs.
    Check out my website for a worry competition and prize:-)
    Hilary and Finny

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Crusoe the Celebrity Dachshund

The wiener dog who think he's more of a celebrity than he really is (for now). Winner of the Best Pet Blog of 2013 at the WeBlog Awards (Bloggies). Follow his blog and Facebook page for all his antics, exploits, and adventures.

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